You must do it all, Mark. Whether that is to travel or to stay at home with your garden. It must be what you want to do above all things. Time is so short, so precious, nothing in life is as important as life itself. It is easy in middle life to put things off, to say "I'll go there another day" or "I must finish my article before I go for a walk". With all my heart, I plead to everyone, do it, just do it. I am 68 and I hope to make 70 if my health allows but I am ok. I'ved sailed the seven seas, seen wonderful things, loved and been loved and taken every single opportunity to have fun. I will go knowing that I followed my heart. But, as Mary Oliver wrote, And what will you do with your one wild and precious life?
What a brilliant advert your words are for living well, in whatever form. Thank you so much Helen. Wishing you much further beyond 70 and many more adventures, large or small
The plants in my garden are part of my logical - chosen- family. They are a disparate group, selected because I love and want them in my life. That's all they need to have in common.
Yesterday in a moment of need, I decided in my wisdom to start digging over an area in our garden overgrown with ivy. I could have jumped in the car and driven to the sea, taken a stroll through the church graveyard to learn of those past, or even just sat in a warm jumper and watched a singular Robin hunting for worms, but no, I chose dirt. Oh how I wish I had flapjacks for my reward though!
Oh, the Waterboys…. Thank you for reminding me of this beautiful song. Couldn’t resist listening to it on YouTube (full version). How much more poignant the lyrics are when listening at 64 than in my 20s!
Well, of course, you had me at Camus. I have been reading from that very same Notebook of his this week. I love with all of your posts that I forget there is a recipe coming at the end, and then that too feels like a little gift. And I'm afraid that I will always exploit any mention of The Truman Show with a reference to Kilar's 'Requiem Pour Le Père Kolbe' which should be listened to in full by everyone, so as to fully relive and savour both the song and that film's redemptive finale.
I’m so overdue a rewatch of The Truman Show, and I shall do as you say and give that a full attentive listen, thank you. And if course, knowing you as I do, I had you in mind as someone who might appreciate Camus’ mention when writing that!
This is beautiful. And helpful, too. I come to it so much from the other direction: my instinct is to always take a walk, go to the sea, see the open fields, rather than tuning into the garden that I ended up being responsible for. For the first three years, more or less the only thing I did was plant apple trees. (Love the idea of them domesticating us.)
Now I’ve had help in slowly turning most of from a football field of grass into a meadow, but that will take several more years. I’ve been trying to find language that will make me want to engage with it all more, and this truly does that.
What a lovely to think to say and for me to read - thank you. My instinct is the same, to the point of ridiculing gardening in my head, but - thank heavens - it gives me so much despite that.
I don’t ridicule gardening in the least; I have the sense that I would be contributing more to the world just by engaging with it, so that lack of attention to it is a failure.
A couple of my pieces actually address that: how slow it has been, how long it has taken, to see the garden as something more than an obligation. This essay today is a lovely help in the right direction. The first publications I read on Substack included several wonderful gardening columns, but they all presupposed a joy and sense of connection and engagement, and offered help on how to implement those. I’m a bit behind on the essential first part 😊
Wonderful, as always. Oh, The Waterboys take me back. Loved to belt out the chorus, badly out of tune of course. I'm a novice gardener and am more than a little alarmed that I may have a touch of the grey fingers. Not enough to kill outright but just enough to make the plants a little sad. I like the idea that nature will break me in, rather than the reverse.
What a lovely read. Yes, i know those ambivalent feelings about gardening, but I do it anyway. I also know the feeling of a desire for flapjacks coming out of nowhere, and I'm definitely going to try your recipe. Thank you.
Whilst I embrace the discomfort of heavy digging, mud and prickles, the necessity to sit still for more than two hours is increasingly an endurance. So, happiness and contentment is more easily found in the garden and the outdoors closer to home. FOMO? A bit, but limiting scrolling helps. Oh and being selective. On which point, great post and recipe portion notes.
Thank you TTL...I feel the same discomfort at sitting still very strongly at certain times but haven't quite figured out what might be the cause (if any) yet
Oh but the garden has so much meaning for people who are not able to walk on the beach or travel to a far away land. It allows to marvel at plants they may never be able to see otherwise and enjoy sunshine and fresh air. It also gives us gardeners a reason to come out even in the worst of weather. If I didn't have my little green house at the end of the garden path I might have never ventured to that corner of my garden until spring. Having my borderline tender plants tucked away in its glass sanctuary makes me go and check on them. Even if there is not much I can do if I suddenly see them perishing in the frost, just looking at them and stroking their crumpled leaves makes me think they know I care and think of them so they just have to hang on until spring. Until I release them back into the garden to grow and enjoy the sun and fresh air.
Yes Katherine, I couldn't agree more. However deeply I sometimes feel it's a waste of time, I know even more deeply that it's entirely the opposite. I hope you've managed to get out in your garden today
Yes definitely never entirely a waste of time even if it makes just one living being happier. That was my motivation anyway for getting out into the garden today to refill the bird feeders 😄
Some of us have to do what we are compelled by our natures to do. Travel (prefer to do that in my mind) and veggies (I do try to bring myself to eat them) don't do it for me one tiny bit.
But I notice we are both compelled to try to make sense of life by writing. To try to amuse ourselves and others by writing. To connect with people by writing. To make pennies by writing.
Should we just resign ourselves to our compulsions and enjoy what we can of them?
You must do it all, Mark. Whether that is to travel or to stay at home with your garden. It must be what you want to do above all things. Time is so short, so precious, nothing in life is as important as life itself. It is easy in middle life to put things off, to say "I'll go there another day" or "I must finish my article before I go for a walk". With all my heart, I plead to everyone, do it, just do it. I am 68 and I hope to make 70 if my health allows but I am ok. I'ved sailed the seven seas, seen wonderful things, loved and been loved and taken every single opportunity to have fun. I will go knowing that I followed my heart. But, as Mary Oliver wrote, And what will you do with your one wild and precious life?
What a brilliant advert your words are for living well, in whatever form. Thank you so much Helen. Wishing you much further beyond 70 and many more adventures, large or small
The plants in my garden are part of my logical - chosen- family. They are a disparate group, selected because I love and want them in my life. That's all they need to have in common.
The very best reason
Oh, this is sublime, Mark. Thank you!
Thank you Helen
Yesterday in a moment of need, I decided in my wisdom to start digging over an area in our garden overgrown with ivy. I could have jumped in the car and driven to the sea, taken a stroll through the church graveyard to learn of those past, or even just sat in a warm jumper and watched a singular Robin hunting for worms, but no, I chose dirt. Oh how I wish I had flapjacks for my reward though!
You are a wiser man than I to head straight to the garden JP!
I think I could have chosen a more inviting spot though Mark. 🤣
Oh, the Waterboys…. Thank you for reminding me of this beautiful song. Couldn’t resist listening to it on YouTube (full version). How much more poignant the lyrics are when listening at 64 than in my 20s!
It is such a beautiful song isn’t it, at least partly because it is so utterly naive and uncritical and we could all do with more of that
Well, of course, you had me at Camus. I have been reading from that very same Notebook of his this week. I love with all of your posts that I forget there is a recipe coming at the end, and then that too feels like a little gift. And I'm afraid that I will always exploit any mention of The Truman Show with a reference to Kilar's 'Requiem Pour Le Père Kolbe' which should be listened to in full by everyone, so as to fully relive and savour both the song and that film's redemptive finale.
I’m so overdue a rewatch of The Truman Show, and I shall do as you say and give that a full attentive listen, thank you. And if course, knowing you as I do, I had you in mind as someone who might appreciate Camus’ mention when writing that!
This is beautiful. And helpful, too. I come to it so much from the other direction: my instinct is to always take a walk, go to the sea, see the open fields, rather than tuning into the garden that I ended up being responsible for. For the first three years, more or less the only thing I did was plant apple trees. (Love the idea of them domesticating us.)
Now I’ve had help in slowly turning most of from a football field of grass into a meadow, but that will take several more years. I’ve been trying to find language that will make me want to engage with it all more, and this truly does that.
What a lovely to think to say and for me to read - thank you. My instinct is the same, to the point of ridiculing gardening in my head, but - thank heavens - it gives me so much despite that.
I wish it did for me! Am trying to get there.
I don’t ridicule gardening in the least; I have the sense that I would be contributing more to the world just by engaging with it, so that lack of attention to it is a failure.
A couple of my pieces actually address that: how slow it has been, how long it has taken, to see the garden as something more than an obligation. This essay today is a lovely help in the right direction. The first publications I read on Substack included several wonderful gardening columns, but they all presupposed a joy and sense of connection and engagement, and offered help on how to implement those. I’m a bit behind on the essential first part 😊
Wonderful, as always. Oh, The Waterboys take me back. Loved to belt out the chorus, badly out of tune of course. I'm a novice gardener and am more than a little alarmed that I may have a touch of the grey fingers. Not enough to kill outright but just enough to make the plants a little sad. I like the idea that nature will break me in, rather than the reverse.
Nature really will Andrea, fear not. And do keep belting out that chorus out of key or not!
Superb. I love the combination of wit, cheerfulness, inspiration and information.
Nice work.
Thank you so much Liz
What a lovely read. Yes, i know those ambivalent feelings about gardening, but I do it anyway. I also know the feeling of a desire for flapjacks coming out of nowhere, and I'm definitely going to try your recipe. Thank you.
Thank you Jacqui, I hope you enjoy those flapjacks when you next get the surprise urge for them
Whilst I embrace the discomfort of heavy digging, mud and prickles, the necessity to sit still for more than two hours is increasingly an endurance. So, happiness and contentment is more easily found in the garden and the outdoors closer to home. FOMO? A bit, but limiting scrolling helps. Oh and being selective. On which point, great post and recipe portion notes.
Thank you TTL...I feel the same discomfort at sitting still very strongly at certain times but haven't quite figured out what might be the cause (if any) yet
Oh but the garden has so much meaning for people who are not able to walk on the beach or travel to a far away land. It allows to marvel at plants they may never be able to see otherwise and enjoy sunshine and fresh air. It also gives us gardeners a reason to come out even in the worst of weather. If I didn't have my little green house at the end of the garden path I might have never ventured to that corner of my garden until spring. Having my borderline tender plants tucked away in its glass sanctuary makes me go and check on them. Even if there is not much I can do if I suddenly see them perishing in the frost, just looking at them and stroking their crumpled leaves makes me think they know I care and think of them so they just have to hang on until spring. Until I release them back into the garden to grow and enjoy the sun and fresh air.
Yes Katherine, I couldn't agree more. However deeply I sometimes feel it's a waste of time, I know even more deeply that it's entirely the opposite. I hope you've managed to get out in your garden today
Yes definitely never entirely a waste of time even if it makes just one living being happier. That was my motivation anyway for getting out into the garden today to refill the bird feeders 😄
This is such a great piece of writing about gardening! Yes, the thing which you might find yourself doing this weekend. Happy pruning, folks.
Thank you Rosie - happy pruning indeed!
Felt every word of this. We must have a cup of tea ✨
Thank you thank you, and yes we must!
Oh I loved this piece……words that rose such an abundance of rich feelings. Thank you.
Thank you Brigid, lovely of you to say
Some of us have to do what we are compelled by our natures to do. Travel (prefer to do that in my mind) and veggies (I do try to bring myself to eat them) don't do it for me one tiny bit.
But I notice we are both compelled to try to make sense of life by writing. To try to amuse ourselves and others by writing. To connect with people by writing. To make pennies by writing.
Should we just resign ourselves to our compulsions and enjoy what we can of them?
I tnink this might be just about the best option available to us!